Monday, February 28, 2011

A Mixed Bag

This is not a mixed bag of lollies! Rather an assortment of things I've discovered as a new mum.

SLEEP - My little darling is very consistent and easy to put down at night time, I've worked out what she likes; the days are more tricky. I'm told by other mums that 'sleep breeds sleep'. In other words sleep is needed for sleep. If babies don't get sleep during the day (for example), they won't sleep well at night. They are not like us adults who have a good sleep and then are up and ready to go for the rest of the day.

Being a young baby still (4 weeks tomorrow), according to the Maternal and Child Health Nurse her current daily pattern should roughly be asleep for 3 hours and awake and feeding for 1 hour. When she is supposed to be asleep for 3 hours I try to do housework, cook, shower and get dressed, eat, grocery shopping, look after our two dogs, other jobs that arise and have some time for myself. All of this is hard to fit in.

So I am very protective and emotionally wrapped up in her sleep and it not being disturbed. Not only does she need sleep, I need her to sleep.When I say 'protective and emotionally wrapped up', I literally mean that I get so angry and disappointed that for a moment (well roughly an hour) I feel on edge, annoyed, frustrated and like I could whack whoever is the cause of her being woken. Not a play whack but a big, hard, I want to hurt you kind of whack.

Baby Items - The best items that I've brought (or been given) that you may not see as necessary when planning for a new arrival are:
  1. a rocking chair for the nursery
  2. a wall clock
  3. a baby carrier (eg; like a baby bjorn)
  4. a wombie - that's what I call it. It's more commonly known as a cocoon or wrap. 
These things make my life a lot easier!

Expressing Myself - Other than writing, when I have a lot of emotions bottled up or ready to explode I like to do one of three things; 1 box - punch a bag (with pink boxing gloves) until I'm hot and sweaty from pulverising something with my fist, 2 run - run until I can feel the wind brushing past me and through my hair and 3 sex - have hot, passionate, pumping sex that leaves me lying breathless in a state of bliss. The reason I like these things is that I don't think and I'm doing something that physically moves my mind to another place.

The first 6 weeks after having a baby you are not supposed to exercise except for walking on a flat surface and it is recommended you abstain from sex while your body recovers from giving birth. So at the moment I'm a little frustrated and ...

Two weeks and one day to go!

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Funny Moments

So far my blog seems to have been a bit down in the dumps - not so bright and cheerie.

Being mum has many more ups. A friend recently asked me
'How's the whole being a mother thing? I imagine its a big life change.'

I replied, 'definitely big changes and a fair amount of work - 24/7. But it's all worth it when you see a little smile or she grabs your finger and wont let go.'

So I thought I would share a few funny things that have happened just over the last 3 weeks. She is 3 weeks old today!

Coming home from hospital (2 days old). Daddy came to pick us up. We were all excited and ready.  Got her down to the car and we couldn't figure out the baby capsule. Last time we looked at it was when we put it in the car 6 weeks prior. That was taking a while - to adjust it to her size. Then we lost the ticket to get out of the carpark. We were all a fluster. In the end I think it took us an hour to leave the carpark.

The first time bub and I were alone after leaving hospital - (6 days old) I was changing her nappy, wiping carefully and thoroughly. All of a sudden a fountain of mustard colour baby poop literally pours into my hand. It seemed to go for quite a while. I was thinking when is this going to end. Luckily Daddy wasn't there to see. Although he still thinks its hilarious.

A helpful nappy tip for those using Huggies (newborn). Although we have modern cloth nappies to use, our little princess is a bit small for them right now. So we have continued using Huggies disposables. They aren't too hard. Just found out though (19 days old) that they have this special line on the outside which changes colour when the nappy is dirty or wet. Now we have known when they've been dirty, the smell gives it away. But wet - well mummy hasn't always been able to tell so she has been checking by opening the nappy and touching it to feel if its moist. Hahaha!!

You gotta laugh! :)

Sunday, February 20, 2011

What A Weekend

Sunday arvo; the weekend is almost over now. I can't believe what we did and didn't do this weekend. It was strange. My husband and I wanted to do something different, get out of the house and spend time together as a young family, the three of us. But what do you do with a newborn baby? It's not like they will enjoy anything. Also there are many things to consider...

  • I need a mummy nap in the afternoon so that I can last the night.
  • You don't want a baby out in the extreme elements of sun, wind and rain. Crazy Melbourne weather!
  • Feeding - as a new mum I need to feel a little comfortable when whipping out my milk jugs. 
  • Cost. Who has money to be throwing around willy-nilly? Especially seeing my parenting payments from the government still haven't come through yet.
  • It takes a long time to get a baby ready and get out of the house. 
  • Nappy bags are heavy - well mine is and it's all necessary stuff. 

That is just off the top of my head.

On Saturday we ended up going to our local shopping centre to return some items and receive a store credit, purchased a glow worm for our lil munchkin and get some groceries. Very interesting stuff. By the end of it I was disappointed, tired and hungry thirsty.

From now on I'm thinking we need to have a little plan in advance. I'm sure we wasted precious time discussing our options and then not doing any of the real ones.

Any ideas for a newborn family?  Or am I supposed to be at home for now??

Saturday, February 19, 2011

New Beginnings

Let me say, today is the first I've ever thought about writing a blog. I've never even read anyone else blogs. I like to write. Nothing professional and as far as I know, nothing too profound. But writing is how I deal with things. It is how I sort out my thoughts and feelings.

So how did I get to this... (writing a blog) well I lost my notebook that I usually write in and as I've heard my mum say 'desperate times call for desperate measures'. Today my feelings about one very small part of becoming a mum came crashing down on me. So I need to put this down on paper or screen as it is now.

The 1st February - a new month and I'm a new mum for the very first time. My beautiful baby girl was born. I love her very much.

But honestly I didn't feel like a mum straight away. There were complications during labour. I won't go into all the details but after being in a tough labour all day I got whisked off to theatre for an emergency forcep birth with an episiotomy.

I didn't feel her come out because of the epidural and I couldn't see what was happening down there because of the ugly blue theatre curtain and no-one was really communicating with me except to say 'push now'. Then while I think we are just waiting for the next contraction and staring around the room in shock that my birth ended up in the sterile room with my nervous hubby sitting next to me although he seemed very far away and out of reach - I feel something slapped onto my chest. I remember it seeming like the action and sound of someone slapping down a freshly caught wet fish. I don't remember anyone telling me straight away that it was my baby. I didn't even know she was out! Then when someone did tell me, I got a quick, rough glance and she was taken again. Gone.

This moment of seeing my baby and holding her for the very first time was gone and it was not how I planned it! I had hoped to hold her in both arms and look at her face and cry happy tears.

After I spent an hour and a bit being stitched and struggling to keep my eyes open in recovery I finally got taken up to the ward to see her and my husband. That moment was wonderful but to me not exactly the same. I still looked at her and held her and loved her. But I missed that first moment and that first hour of having her close and seeing her little face and her initial reaction to the big world outside of my belly. I regret that I won't every get that time back and I feel robbed. 

So today... I just needed to get that out.

Ultimately I know that going to theatre kept us both safe and healthy and i'm glad for the experience and expertise of my team. I thank God for looking after us and giving me a healthy baby. Our bond is strong and this experience has not affected our relationship as mum and bub, just left me a little heart broken for now. Overtime I'm sure it will not seem so bad. I will have many more special moments to look forward to.