Friday, January 29, 2016

Recipe for a storm...

I'm choosing to rejoice in The Lord at all times. Deep breath. I am heart broken. That has not changed. Perhaps intensified. My little girl started school today. Just the thought for more than a second brings a tear to my eye. I dare not think longer than that. 

I am choosing to rejoice in The Lord. My attitude has changed since my last blog post just 5 days ago... 

I abide in Christ and he is my joy and my strength. I will not be swayed in this storm. The battle is not mine but the Lords. I trust Him. He will not fail me. He hears my prayers. I will wait. God will place my husband and I onto the same page either way. He is in control. 

I have been led by Holy Spirit to find my own kind of coping system till then... 

If you're going through a storm try this. It's working for me. 

1. Praying in the Spirit. The Bible says that when we pray in tongues it edifies and encourages us. So that's what I'm doing. Whenever and wherever. 

2. I've found a verse and I'm clinging to it! This is it... 

Psalm 94:19 In the multitude of my anxieties within me,Your comforts delight my soul. 

Reminding myself of it numerous times daily gives me strength. 

3. Praising God. The combination of music and of song to God changes my mindset. It's like distraction but better! 

4. A deep study of The Word. A word study. A theme study. A passage study. Get into it. Go deep. Look at the root words in the Greek or Hebrew. Discover new things. 

That's all I've got for now but I am sustained on my daily bread. And His grace is sufficient for me. 

Nat
Xx


Sunday, January 24, 2016

Broken mummy

To post or not to post? That is the question. 

This week I'm deeply troubled, upset, not liking stuff and generally feeling peeved! And all of that is frustrating because: 

1. I don't want to be that way, 
2. I know what the problem is and 
3. I know how to fix it my way. 

But I am married and so my husband has an opinion and gets a say. In this case, the last say. Sigh. 

When my oldest daughter Olivia was two years old I starting hearing about the idea of homeschooling from a good friend of mine. She was seriously looking into and mostly likely going to homeschool her two youngest daughters. She shared her plans and I listened to her about it. I wasn't opposed to the idea. I just thought it wasn't for everyone and that everyone included me. 

At the time I was very motivated to give my children the best and some what expensive (if need be) education. I looked up schools on the web, thought about it, prayed about it, asked around and I even made charts based on what I thought were the pros and cons. So I took it seriously. 

Anyway, Olivia was due to start three year old kinder soon. I was at home with the girls one week day. Doing housework, playing and something dropped into my spirit. Not just a word. It was more it was an idea with the understanding as to why I should homeschool our girls. It was a revelation from Holy Spirit. 

I remember it was so quick and such a dramatic change in thinking for me that I immediately called my friend to share with her. 

From that time onwards, I felt God leading me in that direction. It is certainly what I wanted and what I thought was best for our girls for at least primary school. 

I understand that others have their concerns with homeschooling which seem to revolve around either a) social issues and or b) quality of education. I know because I used to think that way. Whatever! 

I decided kinder was still important and I had no issues sending her to the kinder where we had pre planned. 

But two years on from my revelation and just one week before she turns 5 years old and my baby girl is enrolled and ready to start primary school, prep at a private co-ed Christian school. 

My husband is a school chaplain and a school teacher and he has a differing opinion on homeschooling. He is against it. There's no talking him around (or begging, I've tried). Until God speaks to him a formal school education it is. 

To say that I am devastated is barely the tip of the ice berg. I am so upset, heartbroken and not happy about it. 

I would suggest those who know me in person don't see me and avoid me this week because i'm either a) looking ok and coming across normal but really I'm hiding behind denial but if it's mentioned I'll burst into tears. Or b) I'm seriously grumpy and don't know how to handle my frustration. So I'm generally not nice. I bounce between the two. A. B. A. B. there's no middle ground. 

5 nights to go and school starts! 😝 

I'm trying to suck it up. Forget about it. Trust God. 

I've prayed. I've pleaded with God. I've cried out to Him. O Lord please! 
Nothing. 

So that's where I'm at and I'm so bummed about it I can't think of anything else to write 😔 

Sorry y'all. Xx 

P.S. Her 2nd day of school is her 5th birthday 😢


Monday, January 11, 2016

Be YOU!

Today I want to remind you how important it is to be yourself. 

It seems a simple message but over the years it's something that keeps making an appearance in my life. 

God made us all unique. We have different DNA, different fingerprints, different everything. So why do we try so hard to fit in? Why do we compare ourselves to others? 

If God wanted 20 Christine's he would have made that many. Hello he is God, he can do anything. And yet he chose on purpose and with intent to create us all beautifully and wonderfully different. 

By trying to be someone else we are really just slapping God in the face. Do we know better than He? Since when does an invention correct itself... Is that not for the inventor to do. It is the same with us and God our creator. 

Do not be afraid to be you! God thinks it's very good. In fact he says, you are created in His image (Gen 1:27) and that you are beautifully and wonderfully made (Ps 139:13-14) 

And since there is no other complete copy of you - you need to be it. 

You are a unique, one of a kind pieces that has great value and worth and your creator loves you! 

Sunday, January 3, 2016

Happy New Year

2016 is here and I'm ready and excited! Three days into it and I'm expectant (no I'm not pregnant :P) but I am very hopeful for good things, breakthrough, blessings and new opportunities. 

2015 was pretty great for my family: we did have challenging times (including two family car accidents and my father being sick) but we also had lots of moving forward and growing. 

And I am getting a sense that it was only the beginning. I am reminded of this verse: 

Isaiah 43:19 
Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert. 

I encourage you to also get excited and be expectant of new and good things. 

Especially if you had a difficult year last year, put it behind you, get stuck into God and His word which is our anchor of hope (Hebrews 6:19) and start to rejoice and pray without ceasing for your situation (1 Thessalonians 5:16-17

Father God loves you and wants good things for you (Jer 29:11-13. I pray His blessings for you. I pray you would know Him deeper!! 

Go now and get excited. Dream big. 

Have fun beautiful one, 
Nat xx